ALESTORM LYRICS

1. Treasure Chest Party Quest

500 years ago when I was born
I crawled from the womb with a drinking horn
I held it to the sky in my tiny metal hand
And got real drunk before I could stand

Well ever since that day I've followed the code
Of stealing all your treasure and living on the road
Now we've come to your city, with nothing more to say
Let's drink and party the Alestorm way

We're only here to have fun, get drunk
And make loads of money
Cos nothing else matters to me
We're only here to drink rum, shoot guns
And live for the party
Come with us and soon you will see
We're only here to have fun, get drunk
And make loads of money
Cos nothing else matters to me
We're only here to get lit, talk shit
And drink all your whiskey
Come with us and soon you will see
We're only here to have fun

Treasure Chest Party Quest!
Whoah-oh, whoah-oh, HEY!
Treasure Chest Party Quest!

In my Lamborghini, flintlock by my side
Stealing loads of treasure, on I-95
Drinking margaritas in the Caribbean Sea
A pirate's life is the only life for me

Well you know we sold out a long time ago
Now we're in it for the money, the hookers and the blow
So we've come to your city, with nothing more to say
Let's drink and party the Alestorm way

We're only here to have fun, get drunk
And make loads of money
Cos nothing else matters to me
We're only here to drink rum, shoot guns
And live for the party
Come with us and soon you will see
We're only here to have fun, get drunk
And make loads of money
Cos nothing else matters to me
We're only here to get lit, talk shit
And drink all your whiskey
Come with us and soon you will see
We're only here to have fun

Treasure Chest Party Quest!
Whoah-oh, whoah-oh, HEY!
Treasure Chest Party Quest!

I set fire to the sky
You're all going to die
So raise up your rum
We're here to have fun
We'll ride cross the...waves
Forever we'll sail
There's nothing to say
So get down and pray
The quest starts today

We're only here to have fun, get drunk
And make loads of money
Cos nothing else matters to me
We're only here to drink rum, shoot guns
And live for the party
Come with us and soon you will see
We're only here to have fun, get drunk
And make loads of money
Cos nothing else matters to me
We're only here to get lit, talk shit
And drink all your whiskey
Come with us and soon you will see
We're only here to have fun

Treasure Chest Party Quest!
Whoah-oh, whoah-oh, HEY!
Treasure Chest Party Quest!

2. Fannybaws

Woah-oh, come take a trip with me
I'll tell you of the greatest man who ever sailed the sea
Woah-oh, Fae Scotland's bonnie shores
He pillaged 'cross the ocean in search of rum galore
Woah-oh, aboard the good ship Scum
He'd fire a mighty blast from the 16 pounder gun
Woah-oh, his legendary crew
Could sail that ship to Hell and back, there's nothing they can't do

He killed the mighty Terrorsquid
The greatest man who ever lived
He beat the Vikings in a bloody war
Meet yer dad and smell yer maw

Fannybaws, he's a fearsome pirate
Fannybaws, he's the scourge of the seas
Fannybaws, with the black flag flying
Plundering, pillaging, spreading disease
Fannybaws, he's a fearsome pirate
Fannybaws, he's the scourge of the seas
Fannybaws, with the black flag flying
Bringing his foes to their knees
Fannybaws

Woah-oah, in Oban he was raised
He drank a bucket full of rum every single day
Woah-oh, his beard of flaming red
Would terrorize his enemies and make them wish they're dead
Woah-oh, four pistols on his belt
He went to battle naked, wearing just a tiger's pelt
Woah-oh, his name was Fannybaws
Now haud yer wheesht ya glaikit cunt or else he'll pump your maw

Fannybaws, he's a fearsome pirate
Fannybaws, he's the scourge of the seas
Fannybaws, with the black flag flying
Plundering, pillaging, spreading disease
Fannybaws, he's a fearsome pirate
Fannybaws, he's the scourge of the seas
Fannybaws, with the black flag flying
Bringing his foes to their knees
Fannybaws

Who killed the mighty Terrorsquid?
Fannybaws
The greatest man who ever lived?
Fannybaws
Who beat the vikings in a war?
Fannybaws
Meet yer dad and smell yer maw, oh
Who drinks his whiskey neat and strong?
Fannybaws
Who's got a boaby two feet long?
Fannybaws
Who's gonna take nae shite from you?
Fannybaws
So what the fuck you gonna do?

He drinks his whiskey neat and strong
He's got a boaby two feet long
He's gonna take nae shite from the likes of you
So what the fuck you gonna do?
Woohoo!

Fannybaws, he's a fearsome pirate
Fannybaws, he's the scourge of the seas
Fannybaws, with the black flag flying
Plundering, pillaging, spreading disease
Fannybaws, he's a fearsome pirate
Fannybaws, he's the scourge of the seas
Fannybaws, with the black flag flying
Bringing his foes to their knees
Fannybaws

3. Chomp Chomp

Chomp chomp!
Chomp chomp!

Sailing out of Mexico heading up to New Orleans
Heard about the biggest treasure horde outside the Caribbean
One stormy night in Caillou Bay we smashed into the reef
A flash of claws, a crash of jaws, a load of big white teeth

If you see an alligator
In your refrigerator
You better say see ya later
Or you might end up dead
They say you should never smile
Right at a crocodile
He'll drag you down into the deep
And eat your fucking head

Chomp chomp!
Chomp chomp!

Chomp Chomp Chomp

Our captain was the first to go, he got ripped into shreds
Still screaming as the alligator swallowed down his legs
One by one the crew all died in several nasty ways
The vision of that massacre still haunts me to this day

If you find a giant cayman
You're gonna have a really bad day man
There's nothing more to say than
I won't see you in a while
Not even Russell Crowe
With a giant crossbow
Ain't got a snowballs chance in hell
To save you from that crocodile

Chomp chomp!
Chomp chomp!

Why oh why, did I jump into that swamp?
Mauled to death by alligators, all singing chomp chomp chomp
Time to die, on a sub-aquatic romp
Mauled to death by alligators, all singing chomp chomp chomp

Chomp chomp!
Chomp chomp!
Chomp chomp!

4. Tortuga

Yar ha ha har!
You wanna know where you are, laddie?
Alright then, let me tell you...

Palm trees sway in the Caribbean breeze
The sunshine beating down
A wanted man with a price on my head
On the run from the British crown
Last week in Port Royal
I stole a ship and killed the crew
I set sail on a moonlit sky
I knew just what I had to do

It's time to spin the wheel
We can go anywhere we feel
We're heading west, to the land thats the best
And I ain't ever coming' back

Tortuga
Tortuga
Tortuga

Welcome to the sea (what?)
Welcome to the sea (what?)
YARR FACE! Here to tell you how it's gonna be, with a
YO HO! Gotta be a pirate's life for me, we gonna
Dig for treasure
Cannon battle, eating lots of cattle, with a
POW POW! Shot from a treasure gun, and a
OH WOW! Royal Navy's got you on the run, we gonna
Quest forever

Sail far across the oceans blue
There's a land that waits for you
Where the alcohol will flow forever
Ride to the land of endless rum
In the Caribbean sun
It's the place where we must go

Tortuga
Tortuga
Tortuga

Across the sea, across the sand
I've set my sights on a far off land
Across the sea, across the sand
I've set my sights on a far off land
Across the sea, across the sand
I've set my sights on a far off land
Across the sea, across the sand
I've set my sights on...Tortuga

Tortuga
Tortuga

Far across the waves
We've sailed for many days
With gold the streets are paved
Where we gonna go? Tortuga!
Far across the waves
We've sailed for many days
With gold the streets are paved
If you're gonna drink rum well you better drink rum with me

5. Zombies Ate My Pirate Ship

In the dead of night
We hear the sound of thunder
Undead fiends arise
To terrorize and plunder
Crawling through the sea
A dendrophagic horde
Our ship's no longer safe
The zombies have just climbed aboard!

Bloodlust in their eyes
Our boat is their prize
A feast for the dead
Devouring the ship and inside of our heads

Far across the sea
Zombies wait for me
Craving brains and treasure
It's their destiny
Til my dying day
Hear these words I say
Zombies ate my pirate ship
I will make them pay

Yo ho yo ho yo ho yo ho
(Those Zombies ate my pirate ship)
Yo ho yo ho yo ho yo ho
(They are a bunch of undead pricks)
Yo ho yo ho yo ho yo ho
(I'll smash their face in with a brick)
Yo ho yo ho yo ho yo ho
(Those Zombies ate my pirate ship)

Centuries ago
The prophecy was written
So the story goes
The grimmest and the true frostbitten
Druids made a pact
That zombie hordes would roam
In search of stolen wood
The forest shall reclaim it's own

They've eaten the mast
Save the crow's nest til last
Sink down to the depths
Cursing their name with our final breath

Die!
Fuck you, zombie scum!

Far across the sea
Zombies wait for me
Craving brains and treasure
It's their destiny
Til my dying day
Hear these words I say
Zombies ate my pirate ship
I will make them pay

Those Zombies ate my pirate ship!

Far across the sea
Zombies wait for me
Craving brains and treasure
It's their destiny
Til my dying day
Hear these words I say
Zombies ate my pirate ship
I will make them pay

Far across the sea
Zombies wait for me
Craving brains and treasure
It's their destiny
Til my dying day
Hear these words I say
Zombies ate my pirate ship
I will make them pay

6. Call Of The Waves

How many times have you wanted to cast off the chains of your life
How many times have you wanted to throw it all in to be free for one moment of time
With a gun in your hand and a sword by your side
The wind at your back and a reason to die
A chance to set sail and to write your own tale in the sky

How many times have they said that you're living a meaningless lie
How many times have they told you to give up your dreams and to simply just lay down and die
Well my friend don't despair we will show you the way
Your battle for freedom is starting today
Cast off your chains, no longer you'll live as a slave

Rise up and conquer the world
The oceans are calling your name
Your day won't be done 'til the battle is won
So rise up my friend, this won't be the end
Rise up and conquer the world
The oceans are calling your name
Your fate is not cast and this day's not your last
It's time that you heeded the call
The call of the waves

How many times have you wanted to kill those who stand in your way
How many times have you held up a fist to the heavens and screamed at the break of the day
There's no force in the world that is holding you back
The power is yours and it's time to attack
You can't be afraid, 'cos this is the call of the waves

Rise up and conquer the world
The oceans are calling your name
Your day won't be done 'til the battle is won
So rise up my friend, this won't be the end
Rise up and conquer the world
The oceans are calling your name
Your fate is not cast and this day's not your last
It's time to stand tall
Cos this is the call of the waves

Rise up and conquer the world
The oceans are calling your name
Your day won't be done 'til the battle is won
So rise up my friend, this won't be the end
Rise up and conquer the world
The oceans are calling your name
Your fate is not cast and this day's not your last
It's time that you heeded the call
Adventure and quests above all
It's time that you heeded the call
The call of the waves

7. Pirate's Scorn

Arr, when I was a young lad, my father said to me
"Arr, lend an ear and learn some pirate history!
Once a fearsome pirate ruled the seven seas
He was your great-great-great-grand-pappy, Quint Skurvy!"
He told me tall tales of his ill-begotten gains
But the greatest treasure of them all still haunts me to this day!

I'll make you swab the deck and then I'll throw you in the brig!
I swear I'll make you walk the plank to right the wrong you did!
The day you mess with Skurvy, arr, you'll wish you were never born!
When the coconut is mine, then you'll feel this pirate's scorn!

He hid it in an idol where it stayed for many years
But the eye of Inka Dinka Doo did shed the crystal tear!
It laid upon the ground until, much to my surprise
A stupid ape just wandered by and snatched my treasured prize!
He discovered it possessed extraordinary power
And stealing it from Skurvy would be his darkest hour!

I'll make you swab the deck and then I'll throw you in the brig!
I swear I'll make you walk the plank to right the wrong you did!
The day you mess with Skurvy, arr, you'll wish you were never born!
When the coconut is mine, then you'll feel this pirate's scorn!

Haahaar! Alright then crew, let's show these filthy landlubbers what we're made of. Are ya ready? Let 'er rip!

I'll make you swab the deck and then I'll throw you in the brig!
I swear I'll make you walk the plank to right the wrong you did!
The day you mess with Skurvy, arr, you'll wish you were never born!
When the coconut is mine, then you'll feel this pirate's scorn!

When the coconut is mine, then you'll feel this pirate's scorn!

Arr!

8. Shit Boat (No Fans)

Your pirate ship can eat a bag of dicks
Your pirate ship can eat a giant bag of dicks
Your shitty wee boat is a fucking joke
It's just the unwanted leftovers of a jobby tuggin' barge
Your pirate ship can eat a bag of dicks
Your pirate ship can eat a giant bag of dicks
You better give us all the money in your treasure chest
Or Kristof's gonna take a shit on your fucking lawn

Your pirate ship can eat a bag of dicks
Your pirate ship can eat a giant bag of dicks
Your poopdeck is a shithole and your rudder is crap
And your cannons are incapable of firing twenty feet
Your pirate ship can eat a bag of dicks
Your pirate ship can eat a giant bag of dicks
Your stupid navigator is an alcoholic
And all your crew look like Lego bricks

Your pirate ship can eat a bag of dicks
Your pirate ship can eat a giant bag of dicks
Your shitty wee boat is a fucking joke
It's just the unwanted leftovers of a jobby tuggin' barge
Your pirate ship can eat a bag of dicks
Your pirate ship can eat a giant bag of dicks
You better give us all the money in your treasure chest
Or Kristof's gonna take a shit on your fucking lawn

9. Pirate Metal Drinking Crew

This is the tale, of a world gone wrong
A history without a song
The threads of meaning lost to me
We're blind to what we cannot see

Aeons ago when the ancients ruled
Otyg and Lumsk, celebrating yule
But then the damn pirates came along and said
YO HO HO - You're fucking dead!

Now your world's crashing down
Only one can survive
It's time you woke up
And realized

We are the pirate metal drinking crew,
We think you're dumb and we hate you too
We are the pirate metal drinking crew,
We don't give a fuck, we think you all suck
We are the pirate metal drinking crew,
We think you're dumb and we hate you too
We are the pirate metal drinking crew,
We don't give a fuck, we think you all suck
FUCK YOU

Sailing the seas of the distant past
We're on a quest to kick your ass
With cannonfire and battlecry
Your mighty legacy will die

The blood of Blackbeard in our veins
We're bringing slaughter, death and pain
There's no escape, tonight you're screwed
Cos we're the pirate metal drinking crew

Across the seven seas
For a thousand years
We're your greatest wish
We're your darkest fear

We are the pirate metal drinking crew,
We think you're dumb and we hate you too
We are the pirate metal drinking crew,
We don't give a fuck, we think you all suck
We are the pirate metal drinking crew,
We think you're dumb and we hate you too
We are the pirate metal drinking crew,
We don't give a fuck, we think you all suck
FUCK YOU

We are the pirate metal drinking crew,
We think you're dumb and we hate you too
We are the pirate metal drinking crew,
We don't give a fuck, we think you all suck
We are the pirate metal drinking crew,
We think you're dumb and we hate you too
We are the pirate metal drinking crew,
We don't give a fuck, we think you all suck
FUCK YOU

10. Wooden Leg Pt. 2 (The Woodening)

I've got a leg, it's made out of wood
It comes from a land far away where the trees they grow good
This my tale, of death and revenge
A quest for redemption to seek true enlightenment deep in the world within
My journey begins

Tonight we set sail
To far off Japan
To murder the bastard who took away both of my hands
Deep in the night, I discover the fiend
I challenge the scoundrel to a fight to the death
And this time I can not lose
He will meet his doom!

Die, you Japanese bastard!
I don't even like sushi!
When you're dead, I'm going to chop off your arms!
And sew them onto me!

Wooden leg, woo-oo-den leg
I've got a wooden leg, wooden leg
Wooden leg, woo-oo-den arm
I have no longer got wooden arms
Wooden leg, woo-oo-den leg
I've got a wooden leg, wooden leg
Wooden leg, woo-oo-den leg
Soon I will not have wooden legs

Now I return
To ancient Madrid
To undo the crimes that a greasy old Spaniard once did
While he's asleep, I cut off his legs
With the power of mystical voodoo-borne magic I stick them back on to me
I am now free!

ヒヒヒ又はカカカよくぞ古代日本の呪いを解いてくれた
わらわは貴様が盗んだ腕に棲まう悪霊
貴様は今日からわらわの傀儡となるのじゃ
そうじゃストロングゼロを108缶買ってきたぞ
いまからこいつをぜーんぶ飲み干してやろうさて貴様はどうする乾杯

Je je je! Has desatado la antigua maldición Española!
Yo soy el espíritu vengativo que vive dentro de las piernas que me habéis hurtado!
He infectado tu cerebro y tomado control de tu cuerpo!
Ahora, vamos a comer muchos tacos y churros, y tu no puedes detenerme! Salud!

I have unleashed, the mystical curse
Now my existence has gotten much worse
My arms and my legs, a will of their own
Controlling my mind from inside of my bones
My legs from Madrid are causing me fear
My Japanese arms just want to drink beer
I pray to the gods, and ask them oh why
There is no escape, I'm doomed 'til I die

Wooden leg, woo-oo-den leg
This is the curse of the wooden leg
Wooden leg, woo-oo-den arm
I wish I still had my wooden arms
Wooden leg, woo-oo-den leg
This is the curse of the wooden leg
Wooden leg, woo-oo-den leg
These legs will haunt me 'til I'm dead!

I can't take it anymore
These cursed limbs are driving me insane
Alright, that does it
It's time to end this
I'm really going to do it
I'm going to chop off my own head!

Wooden head, wooden head, wooden head
I've got a wooden head, wooden head
Wooden head, wooden head, wooden head
I've got a wooden head, wooden head
Wooden head, wooden head, wooden head
I've got a wooden head, wooden head
Wooden head, wooden head, wooden head
I've got a wooden head, now I'm dead!

11. Henry Martin

There were three brothers in merry Scotland
In merry Scotland there were three
And they did cast lots which of them should go
Should go, should go
And turn robber all on the salt sea

The lot it fell first upon Henry Martin
The youngest of all the three
That he should turn robber all on the salt sea
The salt sea, the salt sea
For to maintain his two brothers and he

They had not been sailing but a long winter's night
And a part of a short winter's day
When he espied a stout lofty ship
Lofty ship, lofty ship
Come a bibbing down on him straight way

Hello, hello, cried Henry Martin
What makes you sail so nigh?
I'm a rich merchant ship bound for fair London Town
London Town, London Town
Will you please for to let me pass by?

Oh no, oh no, cried Henry Martin
This thing it never could be
For I have turned robber all on the salt sea
Salt sea, the salt sea.
For to maintain my two brothers and me

Then broadside and broadside and at it they went
For fully two hours or three
Til Henry Martin gave to them the deathshot
The deathshot, the deathshot
And straight to the bottom went she

Bad news, bad news to old England came
Bad news to fair London Town
There's been a rich vessel and she's cast away
Cast away, cast away
And all of her merry men drowne





ALESTORM LYRICS