ANTAGONIST A.D. LYRICS

1. Cold (Intro)

I grew up in the cold with frost inside my bones. But this chill runs through me like the cold never knew me.
This reaper on my back keeps whispering an easy way out but I ain't scared of it,
I'm not scared to live and I ain't scared of it, I'm not scared to live.
(Explanation -
This is about growing up with pain and struggle.
These trials and tribulations will scar you forever.
Everyone has their own story.
Most of my scars are not physical but mental.
Although at times I feel weakened by the path I took to become the man I am today.
I wouldn't be who I am without those lessons.
The war is constant, I have overcome & I will always overcome.)

2. Coffin Keeper

You dig a hole. 5 days a week.
So you can sleep at night, So you can sleep?
Carry the burden, carry the weight
It will drown you one day
And then you'll sleep forever
And your body will rot
The years will bury your name and over time you'll be forgotten
Carry the burden, carry the weight
It will drown you one day
Oh it's hard to see a good hearted kid running scared
Running scared with a tail between their legs going back
Going back on every single thing that they ever said
Fuck that I'd rather be dead
Than be afraid to live
Than to be a coward going back on every single thing that they ever said
I'd rather be dead.
You dig a hole.
5 days a week.
so you can sleep at night, So you can sleep?
Carry the burden, carry the weight
It will drown you one day
Oh it's hard to see a good hearted kid running scared
Running scared with a tail between their legs going back
Going back on every single thing that they ever said
Fuck that I'd rather be dead
You won't get to quench the greed
You won't get to justify the want with the need
You won't get to live beyond your means
Six feet deep
Your body will rot
Coffin keeper
No one will remember your name

(Explanation-
Life is so short. If working an office job or the counter at some fast food place makes you happy then you're doing it right. You shouldn't have to count down the hours waiting to die behind a desk or a power tool if you don't want to be there. Find something you love, be the best you can be at it and most of all be happy.)

3. Haunt Me As I Roam

[feat. Ahren Stringer]

I saw your ghost it was calling out for me. Do you know where it goes at night because it always come to me

I saw your ghost it was calling out for me. Do you know where it goes at night

Because it always comes to me
The world turns and I'll forever mourn

And I'm sorry that I wasn't the closest
And I'm sorry but I always cared
I could see this coming a mile away
Didn't do enough to show you another way

I loved you before
I love you still
I always will
Haunt me as I roam

And I can't sleep some nights when I see your face
Just to know a life can be lost and just slip away

You were fucked up when I saw you and I don't know if you ever knew
You were fucked up when I saw you but my words to you forever ring true

I loved you before
I love you still
I always will
Haunt me as I roam

Sometimes those feelings affect me. Like I never could grasp the reality of when you left me and that's selfish to say because you left us all when you took your life away.

Haunt me as I roam

You needed something to something to hold on to

4. Hard Feelings

I guess theres too much of you in my veins & it's slowly starting to shut me down.
Give me a reason to breath
Give me a reason to think clearly
Tell me why I shouldn't leave
Tell me why I shouldn't wander endlessly
& it's slowly starting to shut me down.
Ive been thinking I've been thinking about this too long and I've been going about this all too wrong.
Never knew what to say or what to do to voice these thoughts the best to you.
When I wake up I feel sick.
There is no end to this. There is no end.
I guess theres too much of you in my veins & it's slowly starting to shut me down.
Give me a reason to breathe
Give me a reason to think clearly
Tell me why I shouldn't leave tell me why I shouldn't wander endlessly
Nothing worth keeping comes that easy,
This pain this world won't defeat me
Never knew what to say or what to do
To voice these thoughts the best to you.
When I wake up I feel sick.
There is no end to this.
I guess theres too much of you in my veins & it's slowly starting to shut me down.
Give me a reason to breathe
Give me a reason to think clearly
Tell me why I shouldn't leave tell me why I shouldn't wander endlessly
When I Wake I feel sick
There Is No End to this

5. Wanderlust

[feat. Andrew Neufeld of Comeback Kid]

I'm staring at the sun, screaming out my lungs. I've sang a hundred words to chase a hundred problems right out of my mind. I've got so much trouble on my mind, I can't describe.
No words to hide the pain behind my eyes
So where do we go from here??
give me heaven, give me hell, give me an answer
ARE WE LOST? WANDERLUST.
Still searching all these years gone by and still no end in sight.
I'm still staring at the sun,
screaming out my lungs
Ive sang a hundred words to chase a hundred problems right out of my mind
I'm staring at the sun, screaming out my lungs
I've sang a hundred words to chase a hundred problems right out of my mind
When did the compass break?
when did we lose our way?
give me heaven, give me hell, give me an answer
ARE WE LOST? WANDERLUST
Still searching all these years gone by and still no end in sight.
I'm still staring at the sun, screaming out my lungs
I've sang a hundred words to chase a hundred problems right out of my mind
I'm staring at the sun, screaming out my lungs
I've sang a hundred words to chase a hundred problems right out of my mind
I swear with myself as my witness
that I, I'll get through anything.
I can get through this.
I swear with myself as my witness
that I'm still staring at the sun, screaming out my lungs
I've sang a hundred words to chase a hundred problems right out of my mind

(Explanation - I discovered hardcore, hip hop and punk music when I was about 12 years old courtesy of older siblings. At the time of writing this I am 29 years old. That's almost 20 years later I'm still coming back to this music to escape. To help me heal. To hype me up. To put me to sleep. To wake me up. To connect. To disconnect. To reminisce and to daydream of what could be.)

6. Dogs Blood

[feat. JJ Peters of Deez Nuts]

So So sick of the same thing Someone wake me up get me out of this dream
So So sick of a life on repeat Broken Record still spinning the same beat
Still dying still lying through your teeth
I still see disease in your eyes in these streets ever hour every day every week
Look at me I still remember everything
And I hope you walk the earth alone
And I hope you carry the weight of every lie you spun of every straw you placed that broke a back
I hope your dog blood rots you from the inside out
Get those middles fingers up cause
Fuck the government fuck the cops
Fuck authority and fuck the system
And fuck you too if you're fucking with them
Now whose side are you on? If you're not on mine. You're just a nark, just a snitch, just a bitch, don't pretend we are one and the same, And I'm so sick of the same shit
On repeat like it's Groundhog Day
There's always hell to pay and we are all just die in the end
Life's short, Down for anything,
FUCK A FAKE FRIEND.
I still see disease in your eyes in these streets ever hour every day every week
I still remember everything
And I hope you walk the earth alone and I hope you carry the weight
Of every lie you spun of every straw you placed that broke a back
I hope your dog blood rots you from the inside out.
Get those middles fingers up cause
Fuck the government fuck the cops
Fuck authority and fuck the system
And fuck you too if you're fucking with them
Now whose side are you on? If your not on mine You're just a nark, just a snitch, just a bitch, dont pretend we are one and the same.
So now the lines been drawn in the sand
You better fucking know on which side that you stand
and if there's a single doubt in your weak fucking mind
bet that we all know that you ain't one of our kind
the life we live ain't for the faint heart you see
so do your research before you try and walk this line g
this is for real we ain't playing no games
you fucking lame, we ain't one and the same bitch

I'm a dreamer, I've always been. Some would say the things I believe aren't realistic or obtainable. I've always wished for a just future where those in power strive to preserve the environment, sustain all forms of life and most importantly care for the people. People over profit should be an unquestionable trait in every politician. But sadly we live in a world corrupted by money and status. We destroy beautiful things to create and consume products that are both toxic to ourselves and to the places we live. I would liken these practices of the human race to a disease, a cancer eating away at the world until we eventually kill it. At the time of writing this song there have been countless acts of police violence against unarmed surrendering civilians on the news. These law enforcers are meant to serve and protect the public. They are there to make it as safe as possible. Not to shoot to kill someone who steals two cans of soda. There is no outcry from other policemen condemning their peers' actions, there is no scream for change with how they are educated in serving the public. This song is about endeavoring to being a conscious consumer. Living a just life in all regards. Having fun with your friends, doing what you love and not disrespecting those along your path who don't deserve it because if you can't change your own habits then how can you expect anyone else to. It's also a fuck you to those that don't.

7. Old Love

I used to see the world in your eyes All its beauty and its pain
And we felt the same
Now I only see the darkness inside
Only sorrow remains
And I drown in the shame
That I feel better for it
Yet I wonder if I should discard this success and share the pain as penance
For every wrong that I've done, It's wrong that you suffer, For I was your lover
If you're in my heart then you're in my veins and I didn't think that'd go away
But something cut so deep and you bled out of me
And she said "I hope you die, I hope you rot in a loveless grave. Just pain all love forgotten," and she said, "I hope you choke."
"You will beg for my forgiveness, you will beg for my sympathy, and I'll say no. I'll say nothing."
Fuck it's so damn hard... Fuck it.
I was the blood in your veins you flowed through me one and the same but the knife cut so deep and you bled out of me.
And I drown in the shame that I feel better for it
For every wrong that I've done, it's wrong that you suffer, For I was your lover
If you're in my heart then you're in my veins and I didn't think that would go away but something cut so deep and you bled out of me
A house that used to be a home
Now stands empty & the bodies that grew within now walk alone
And she said, "you will wake up one day and realise that everything you hated
was just you reflected and on that discovery self loathing and misery will drown you unequivocally."
Go figure.
(Explanation- From my experience love is the worst / best thing you can ever be lucky enough to share. It never runs out but sometimes it can breed bitterness and spite. People do and say horrible things when they're hurt and then those words are stuck with the other forever. It's fucking hard.)

8. You’re Killing It (Downer)

[feat. Sam Carter of Architects]

And forgive my sin but then I prayed for the day the rains come and wash you away. All the deceit, all the abuse, all the disease. To cleanse the wound, to end the curse. So I can heal, be free of your disease. I pray
For the end of days
For the rains to fall
For the rains to come and wash you away
I know why your life is so empty
I know why you're always in pain
and forgive my sin but then I prayed for the rains to come and wash you away.
How many years have I known you?
How much time have we shared?
How many lies have you spilled into the air?
And after all this time I've seen so many leave your side you will never realise -
you will never know why.
I pray
For the end of days
For the rains to fall
For the rains to come and wash you away
I know why your life is so empty
I know why you're always in pain
and forgive my sin but then I prayed for the rains to come and wash you away.
I know why your life is so empty
I know why you're always in pain

(EXPLANATION - Surround yourself with like minded people to be the best you can be. Don't accommodate those who drain your time and energy. Their negativity will creep into you and waste you away.)

9. Ugly Days

I can give and I can run until there is nothing left and then at my end what solace will appear? What should I expect? Broken and a mess. Cliche words but fit my profile best.
I feel sorry for those who have wrung these words so there's no colours left because you can't climb the mountain when the truth comes crashing down on you.
I can live and I can love until there is nothing left and then at my end I wonder if my solace will appear.
I hate this world that I see today.
But I still know it can be beautiful in every way
We all have ugly days
I hate this world that I see today
But I still know it can be beautiful in every way
Do you know what it's like to be bested
Have you lost have you fought & not won
Do you know what it's like to be tested
Do you know what it's like to overcome
I can fake and I can hate until there is nothing left and then at my end what solace will appear?
What should I expect? Broken and a mess. Cliche words that crush my fucking chest.
I hate this world that I see today.
But I still know it can beautiful in every way.
We all have ugly days.
I hate this world that I see today
But I still know it can be beautiful in every way.
We all have ugly days.

(Explanation - Don't focus on the negatives out of your control. Keep your head held high, believe in yourself.)

10. Mother, Father

Mother, father what have I done? Where is your quiet son? what has he become?
Stuck inside these walls
Stare through the windows into my soul
Just tell it where to go.
It's got no hope - it's got no home.
I've made some mistakes and I've burnt all of you
I've made some poor decisions and I've hurt all of you
I am I am I am - the same inside but those actions will haunt me until i die
Not afraid to say I lost my way. Walked this path for too long. Am I better off? Am I worse? No regrets just some sad fucking songs.
I'm afraid. I lost. I am worse
No regret. No cure. I accept this curse
Stuck inside these walls
Stare through the windows into my soul
Just tell it where to go.
It's got no hope - it's got no home
I'm afraid. I lost. I am worse.
No regret. No cure. I accept this curse.
Mother, father what have I done?
Where is your quiet son? what has he become? Mother? Father?

(Explanation - We all make mistakes. The only real mistake you can make is not learning and growing from what you have experienced.)

11. For Anyone Who Hurts

The sun is shining but your blood runs cold, there is a chill in your bones.
And you would swear there is a hole where your heart is meant to be
Not sure why, but your inside is hollow and empty.
And you're thinking some dark dark thoughts, but you can push them right out of your mind if you try. I swear.
"Trust me"

Things are gonna be different
Nothing will stay the same
It will get better
And everything will change
Say so long, say farewell
live and let die
It is cliche but every word I truly mean.
there is so much beauty to be seen.
And you're beautiful too kid.
You will be loved, you will be warm.
And these paths in life are meant to be walked.
"Believe me"

Things are gonna be different
Nothing will stay the same
It will get better
And everything will change
Say so long, say farewell
live and let die

Just don't give up.
Just don't let go.
I know you won't.

Just spend a little less time chasing those thoughts in your mind and just let them go...

Things are gonna be different kid.
Nothing will stay the same
It will get better and everything will change.

It will get better and everything will change.

Things are gonna be different kid, and everything will change.





ANTAGONIST A.D. LYRICS