SERRABULHO LYRICS

1. Pornocchio

[Lyrics by Susana Catalão]

His name is Pornocchio,
He mounts chicks like he’s in a rodeo.
He’s a self-confessed vaginator,
And a genital exercise vindicator.

His sperminal velocity goes off the charts,
And he is the expert of female private parts.
Once a broad gave him toothy blowjob
That almost pulled out his manly knob.

On another occasion he was eating a pussy
And almost chocked because it was so bushy.
Pornocchio is also known as the cocktopus
‘Cause he shags so damn good he must come with eight cocks plus.

He gets pussy so frequently
Thus doing pubic flossing easily.
His penis is an inter-continental ballistic projectile
Made for what’s vaginal and avoiding the rectal.

He has a tyrannosaurus prick
Making all others look like a toothpick.
He is specially good when he lies
‘Cause his wooden thing oversizes.

His life is an ejaculatory inevitability
And masturbation is only a recreational facility.
Also you shouldn’t masturbate too much, even though it calms,
It’s a fact it gives you hairy palms.

2. Congro

[Lyrics by Carlos Guerra]

Comi um congro
Contra o balcão
Fiquei empenado
Com tanta emoção.

Momento picante
Com muito terror
Tapei o nariz
Ai, que odor.

Congro, congro
Mas que desespero
Quando não há pão
Até migalhas vão .

Tapei-lhe a cabeça
Saltei-lhe p’rá espinha
Saquei-lhe as escamas
Furei-lhe a tripinha.

Em tempo de guerra
Não se limpam armas
Já o meu avô dizia:
O que fazia mal
Bem lhe sabia.

3. Buttman

[Lyrics by Susana Catalão]

He is chic and wears tights,
Likes high heels and sometimes bites.
He loves dancing and cooking shows,
Speaks French and reads romantic prose.

Buttman!

He likes leather and cosmetics,
Hair removal and diuretics.

He is the chief Butt professional,
Loves all that is intestinal.
He is not demanding with an ass,
And even endures the collateral gas.

He likes them bald, he likes them hairy
He likes them tiny, fat or smelly.
He doesn’t mind overtight assholes,
Nor if they have hemorrhoids or moles.

He is the chief Butt professional,
Loves all that is intestinal.
He is not demanding with an ass,
And even endures the collateral gas.

He inserts foreign objects in his ass
And has a lifelong anal pass.

Buttman also wishes he was a cat
To lick his own balls
And his penis better look at.

4. Pentilhoni Nu Culhoni

[Lyrics by Carlos Guerra]

Tenho um pentilhoni
Espigado nu culhoni
Que cena abismal
Estou a bater mal.

O que é que eu faço agora
Com este esquisito pentilhoni
Vou ter de me por fino
Senão vai-me inchar o culhoni.

Tenho um colhão inchado
Até parece um cogumelo
Vou saltar do telhado
Cair em cima do farelo.

Fui parar ao hospital
Dei um peido, cheirava mal
Apareceu-me uma enfermeira
Podre de boa e com a borracheira.
Começou-se a portar mal
Eu cada vez a bater mais mal.

Ela doida, a mexer nu culhoni
Saltei-lhe em cima e espiguei-lhe o cuzoni

Ai, ai, ai, ai, ai, o meu colhão
Não me mexas aí com a mão
Senão com esta comichão
Vais destruir o cabeção.

Ai o meu colhão…!!

Tenho um pentilhoni
Que coisa anormal.
A moncosa da enfermeira…
Aquilo correu mal!

5. Happy Fornication

[Lyrics by Susana Catalão]

Have been Mr. Single for a while
Got no females in a square mile.
Already have calluses in my hands,
Too much masturbation no one withstands.

Now and then I try a household device,
But even that won’t suffice.
Got myself so delirious
That my neighbor’s goat looks kind of vicious.

The other day I whacked off with a plunger
Almost got me a penile puncture.

I’m so happy, ohhh.

Even brought my proctologist appointment ahead
And stuck my dick in a banana bread.
All I wanted was a happy fornication
But chicks don’t dig me ‘cause of my genital malformation.

Went down to the bar to get intoxicated
Met some broads and got animated.
Spotted a girl and we drank ‘til late
End up trying to rise the birth rate.

Next morning I had a huge hangover
Still I wish I wasn’t sober!
Liquor doesn’t teach you to spot a transvestite,
Thought her name was Rita but no, it was Yosemite!

6. Peidinho Ron Ron

[Lyrics by Carlos Guerra]

Peidinho ron ron, que bom, que bom.
Peidinho ron ron, que mau, que mau.
O meu peido parecia um gato a ronronar.

7. Star Whores

[Lyrics by Susana Catalão]

Met these intergalactic skanks
That were real sperm banks.
They fought with dildo sabers
And had long cock raiders.
Their vaginas were a black hole
Swallowing penises in its whole.
They humped the Jedi Master
Put his dick in a plaster.
With booty hunters they got befriended,
Sometimes too much in and out got limbs distended.

These chicks dig the dark force
As well as getting on all fours.
Among them was Princess LayHer
Said to always say a prayer.

Go Star Whores, and may the foreskin be with you!

Since she got often on her knees
And sucked with expertise.
Screwed this fellow Imperial
But his penis was venereal.

She also met Darth Invader
Sadly he was a fanny evader.
He was as gayer than Elton John
And switched her for an ass to stick on.

8. Testicular Torsion

[Lyrics by Susana Catalão]

I was fasting,
My penis had no action.
He was depressed and friendless,
Had no hole to fit in.

Tried manual decompression,
Put my ding dong in a fan,
Even used the vacuum cleaner
And stuffed it in an apple pie.

Nothing seemed to reduce the swelling
All day long my cock was sticking up.
So I found this obese chick
She was horrendous but had no dick.
She was so fat she had front, side and back boobs,
But still she had a fanny.

Once she humped me,
She gave me testicular torsion.
Bloody fat chick,
Now my balls are all twisted!

Nothing seemed to reduce the swelling
All day long my cock was sticking up.
So I found this obese chick
She was horrendous but had no dick.
She was so fat she had front, side and back boobs,
But still she had a fanny.

Testicular torsion, testicular torsion.

9. Vaseline

[Lyrics by Susana Catalão]

(It’s not time to masturbate
Just relax, take it easy.
Yours is still small, that’s your fault
That’s so far you have to grow.

Find an oil, take a porn
If you want, use a Vaseline.
Look at me, mine is old
But I’m fertile.

Mine was once like yours is now
And I know that it’s not easy.
It’s precum when you’ve found
Something cumming out.

But take your time, enjoy your porn
Think of everything you’ve seen.
For your dick will grow tomorrow
But your balls may not.

How can I try to explain?
When I do, my cum goes again.
It’s always been a shame
Same old story.

From the moment I could shake
It’s always just precum now.
There’s a way, and I know
That I have to bang a whore
I know, I have to go…)

There was a virgin named Magdalene
She was told to use Vaseline.
Thought copulating was hard,
And put her vagina on guard.
Got a bit sore from too much male entry,
The guy’s burrito wasn’t too gentle.
At least there was Vaseline in her crack
Thus she was able to screw Jack.

Vaseline, Vaseline!

There was this fellow homosexual
Thought asses were very sensual.
Had to lubricate the sausage,
To avoid some anal blockage.

Others have to play it solo,
And strangle their own pink oboe.
But don’t overdo on masturbation
Or you may find yourself with a penile dislocation.

Sometimes you have to do the plumbing
Before you proceed to the actual humping.
That’s why vaseline is the best lubricant
To make your genitals jubilant.

10. Life Of A Penis

[Lyrics by Susana Catalão]

I am a sad Winnie,
Wrinkly and skinny.
Always with a bad hairstyle
Never have a shag worthwhile.
Live tightly with two nuts,
Now only desired by flatulent buts.

Used to be such a stallion,
Could hump a whole battalion.
Never lacked of pussy,
Waxed, shaved or bushy.

Life of a Penis!

Sometimes they were morbidly obese,
Others they smelled like cheese.
At times I went for the experienced ones,
Others for the catholic nuns.
But I really loved the virgin cunt
Where one could go treasure hunt!

People called me mushroom head,
My fame was quite widespread.
Always found a first-class vagina
Even if it was in China.
Once I was constantly erect,
Nowadays I am forever wrecked.

Can only get a Viagra boner,
From now on I’ll be a loner.
I have crabs and incontinence,
Herpes and impotence.

Can’t even get manual decompression
Since my owner is handless.
A hard on would be a bless,
To save me from this great depression!
I am a sad Winnie, wrinkly and skinny.
Always with a bad hairstyle
Never have a shag worthwhile.
Live tightly with two nuts,
Now only desired by flatulent buts.

11. Caguei Na Betoneira

[Lyrics by Carlos Guerra]

Estava mesmo apertadinho
Com o cocó à entrada do cuzinho
Sem saber o que fazer
Nem sitio p’ra me esconder.

Olhei em meu redor
Avistei uma betoneiraLá não aguentava tremendo odor
Andava de caganeira.

Caguei na betoneira
Na betoneira, na betoneira...

Depois desse tormento
Lá passou o sofrimento
E depois veio o pior azar
Não tinha onde me limpar.

Bordas húmidas a cortar
Só tinha uma opção
Ou raspar na betoneira
Ou limpar com a minha mão.

Caguei na betoneira
Mas que grande complicação
Irá ficar para a historia
Que merda de situação.

12. B.O.O.B.S. (Best Objects Of Baby Sucking)

[Lyrics by Susana Catalão]

Boobs are a perfect creation,
Always worthy of adoration.
They look great in a slow motion race,
And they’re always ideal to get to third base.
Breasts are so awesome they come in pairs,
They’re built-in airbags that everyone stares.
Boobs are cool to squeeze and they even float
And into the cleavage you can motorboat .
In their 20’s they’re nice and firm
In their 30’s and 40’s still round but a bit worn,
However in their 50’s and further on
They’ll make you cry for what’s forever gone.

Boobies come in various shapes,
Sometimes they’re big as melons others small as grapes.
At times they are perfect others lopsided,
Now and then they’re perky and their nipples misguided.
There are big nipples boobs and those just hanging,
Some are known as pillow tits that are very good for camping.
Super sized breasts can suffocate a guy
Migrator and wanderer titties can leave you with a black eye.
Every so often nipples get hard when its cold,
You should always seize a booby before it gets too old!

Sadly not all boobies make sense,
They can happen to be of a fat, greasy dude that suffers from flatulence.
Booooooooobs!

13. Snow White And The Seven Dwarfs (Gang Bang Edition)

[Lyrics by Susana Catalão]

People say she is inoffensive
But her sex is quite intensive.
Keeps a Kamasutra by the nightstand
And has a massive mammary gland.

Sometimes she uses a vibrator,
Others she just bangs a sailor.
They say she is as white as snow
And always has someone to blow.

The other day with nothing to do
She just wanted someone to screw.
As she was starting to pray
The seven dwarfs came in the way.

It was quite a pleasant score
As the dwarfs went down on her.
They seem to have the perfect proportion
To perform an oral incursion.

But sadly they all have a very small prick,
So she had to carry on in pursuit of the magic stick.
Go on snow white with your Clitassaurus Rex
Keep on with extramarital-sex.







SERRABULHO LYRICS