TANKARD LYRICS

1. Commandments

Moral law! The drinker's guide
Was handed down by god
Sacred law for man to follow
Revere them as your own

Life's too short to waste your brew
It's plain to see-obey the rules

Thou shalt not waste and thou shalt not spill
Just drink your beer - Commandments
Thou shalt not puke cause there's no excuse
Just drink your beer - Commandments

Mankind was long deprived
Of the rules encased in stone
Ten written the rest were lost
When will they be found?

Laws misplaced for centuries
Where can they be? The brewery!

Rejoice I The time is now
Fulfill Your sacred vows
Pay need to the blessed stone
Respect the holy law

Life's too short to waste your brew
It's plain to see-obey the rules

Laws misplaced for centuries
Where can they be? The brewery!

2. Shit-Faced

Nice hotel - place to stay
We sought a place to get some rest
The owner said: "Please keep it down"

"We're good boys" - so we lied
Raise some Hell!

Two days passed - fuckin' mess
The maids refused to clean our stys
Ravioli neath the rug
Stench of beer - everywhere

We were shit-faced - relieving stress is so much fun
Fuckin' shit-faced - getting sick and thrashing rooms

One week down - place was fucked
We tore the heater off the wall
And broke the windows in our room
No one cared - we were drunk

Raise some Hell!

Bed diving - brand new sport
From our beds we'd start to leap
And dive into the cabinets
They broke too - nothing spared

Went downtown - forgot the keys
We climbed into someone's window
But they shot teargas in our eyes
Didn't - locked outside

Raise some Hell!

Place destroyed - where to now?
We moved into another room
Five minutes passed and it was thrashed
Last warning - they kicked us out

3. TV Hero

Monday morning horror, breakfast on my shirt
Everything is wrong today
Traffic driver me crazy, my blood is running hot
Time is always slipping away
Bum! Jerk! Piece of dirt!
The bosses welcome knock me down
Kiss my ass! I'll get you someday
Revenge is sweet and I will make you pay

Just you wait and see, there's an animal in me
You can't run or hide from the demon deep inside

Friday night avenger, slamming of the door
Set the record straight and pay it mean
Kick around my woman, show her who is boss
I'm the master of the video - machine
Rocky, Rambo, Zombies, Cannibals or Snuff
What's it gonna be tonight?
Cambodial I can't enough
Of watching yellow bastards die

Pushing of the button, let the deadly game begin
Can he tell the real world from the nightmare he is in?
People cashing in on pushing terror up your brain
You will go insane!

TV HERO - mutilation
TV HERO - on the screen
Rape the women, slay the children
Violence like you've never seen
TV HERO - gory vision
TV HERO - in my head
Zombie slaughter all night long
A thrill you won't forget

Stumble over corpses, wade in seas of blood
Slaughter to the rhythm of a million guns
Random execution, my face in full of crud
From the guts of Charlie dying in the mud

Just you wait and see, there's an animal in me
You can't run or hide from the demon deep inside

Ecstasy from viewing murder on TV
Orgy of insanity and pain
Killer in the armchair, satisfying lust
Watching victims of a deadly game
More! Death Heat me up
My pint is hard from seeing blood
The climax! I'm shooting my gun
Brutality is sex for men

Another war is over, this battle you have won
Rewind and put it back upon the shelf
Your dreary life's returning, but now you've had your fun
So you will take another day of Hell
They're selling you aggression, to simplify oppression
Numbing your emotions and your mind

4. F.U.N.

Something's a wrong!
Last night's gig didn't go to well!
People fighting near the stage
a cable ripped and fucked the sound

Fighting! Beating!
There must be another way
All we ask is to have a good time
You don't need to start a senseless fight
Have yourself some F.U.N.

Macho man!
These homos have to strut their stuff
So they can show how cool they are
But we know they're knucklehead

Mellow out!
Just kick back, enjoy the show
Spare us all, don't prove yourself
Why ruin someone else's night?

5. Try Again

[Originally performed by Spermbird]

Try!
When every day life starts to get you down
And your problems seem too many
When your job is shit, the rent is due
And you're down to your last penny
Where do you go? Who do you count on
When there's no place left to hide?
When your parents don' like you and they told you so
They wish that you had died

I look at you - and I know what to do
I look at you - I know what to do
I look at you - and I know what to do
I look at you - I know what to do

They gotta try!
Now I'm not here to preach or tell you
The way you got to live
Just stop and thing about what you want
And what you want to give
Goddammit life is what we're here for
Then better get away from me

Try again!
You got to get up in the morning and try again
Not tomorrow - do it today
Young or old, it don't matter man
Don't let your life slip away
You got take a chance - push yourself
Stand up for what you know is right
Don't take no shit from anyone
Let'em know that you're ready to fight

Try again!
Now, there's no easy answers
But here's my final advice to you
Take control of your life, man
Work hard and follow thru
And if a friend is travelling a rocky road
Then help him on his way
Tell him that he's got to try again
And try harder every day

6. The Morning After

Can this be or am I dreaming?
What a mess!
Woke up drunk lying on the floor
This cannot be, my place is trashed

Broken bottles everywhere
Vomit oozing down the stairs

I asked myself how did this happen
Don't recall
Why the nasty, pounding headache?
I need relief, where's the tylenol

Lying in my bed! With a swollen head!
What did I do? I always regret the morning after!

Morning's passed, now I think I remember
Holy shit!
Ugly bitch playing with my member
Mutated sow with an extra tit
Senseless ruckus late at night
That's when we began to fight
Four AM and we were hungry
Cooked some food
Ate until the fridge was empty
Then they left, all their bellies full

Now my brain feels like mashed potatoes
Getting sick
I swear to kick this nasty habit
And never drink for ever more

Headache ceases, all is fine
Getting thirsty, where's the wine?

I cannot stop though I'm seeing double
Sloshed again
I know it's sad but I really need it
Cause alcohol is my only friend

Lying in my bed! With a swollen head!
What did I do?
Lying in my bed! With a swollen head!
What did I do? I always regret the morning after!

7. Desperation

Always the same - I postpone things to the very end
No one's to blame - except for myself
I've had three weeks to write this song - I put it off - Too tired!
Tomorrow It's due now I must compose - I'm really wired - Too bad!
Absence of mind - my brain's still void of inspired thoughts
Falling behind - the hours pass on my digital clock

Desperation, Desperation
I don't know what to write -
Falling prey to Desperation
Plaglarism sure sound nice -
I'm forced into Desperation

Back's to the wall - the pressure's up and I start to sweat
But that's not all - The group's Impatient and they start to bitch
I waited till the last minute - I've got no time - Your fault!
Can't even seem to think clearly - I've lost my mind - So what?
I paid the price - a meltdown and a sleepless night
But that's okay - I drew a blank so I wrote this song

Always the same - I postpone things to the very end
No one's to blame - except for myself
I've had three weeks to write this song - I put it off - Too tired!
Tomorrow It's due now I must compose - I'm really wired - Too bad!
Absence of mind - mu brain's still void of inspired thoughts
Falling behind - the hours pass on my digital clock

...Into Desperation
...Desperation

8. Feed The Lohocla

Was it destiny that one day It was born
Drunk creature of the night who haunts us for our brew
It was dark, midnight or so, when most had left for home
Breath of life, Lohocla lives, the barley entity
Now it is alive spawned from the loins of beer
Throat parched and on a quest to quench his - die hard thirst
All he asks oblige him in giving up your drink
It's okay, don't shit your pants, he's tamer than you think

Where is he from? Why is he here?
Nocturnal boozer on a pursuit of beer
So set him free from sobriety-tonight!

Inebriate! One of his favorite words
Control his state of mind though he has no dime
Out of cash and out of stash, he's coming off his high
Time to cruise the local joints to mooch Iiquld food

Wading through the bar and wasted off his ass
Lohocla's drunk again yet still he begs for more

One day you'll encounter him,
you'd better share your beer

9. Help Yourself

Holy wars, Insane crusaders
Killing in the name of god
Ayatollahs with machine guns
Iran, Iraq must drown in blood
Beirut, Belfast, Sikhs and Hindus
Everywhere you look today
Messages of all religions
Lead their followers astray

Help yourself! (Help yourself)
We need no fucking preachers in our life
Help yourself! (Help yourself)
And all you mighty gods can go to Hell

Opium for brainless masses
Inane blabber from the pope
Always on the side of power
Giving people foolish hopes
Birth control Is called a sin, when
Million don't any bread
Praying in your gothic palace
Doesn't get the hungry fed

TV Jesus, phoney prophets
Halled by supersticious fools
Preach the gospel of the dollar
Praise the lord while money rules
This is not the middle ages
but it seems we haven't grown
Still need ancient faiths to cling to
Can't we make It In our own?

Let everybody hear the message
It's time to heal the deaf and blind
Cast away your false religion
People, start to use your mind

10. Mon Cheri

I want you my baby
I need you my sweetheart
My heart Is full of love for you

I need you to stroke and
I need you to kiss

Lying In your arms
And touching your skin
I can't describe this feeling I have
I want you to get and I want you to feel

Mon Cheri - I love you so
Mon Cheri - I need you my baby

Your lips like red roses
Your eyes like the blue sky
Your legs and your hair are driving me insane
I can't take a breath without you my darling





TANKARD LYRICS